You just met a new guy. He asks you out. Do you jump into bed with him on the first date? Second date? How long do you wait? If you wait at all!
The answer depends on what you want from this man. Are you looking for a husband? Or just a romp in the sack?
If you are looking for a husband, wait, you may say I just want a boyfriend first… I have to ask you what your ultimate goal is. Is it to have a boyfriend or to settle down and get married. You see marriage is a goal for the majority of women. It’s in our DNA. We have a need for security, to make sure that we are protected and taken care of and our children have a chance. This goes back to the caveman days. Which one is going to give me the best chance for survival? So don’t be ashamed to say “Yes, I am looking for a husband.”
So now, if you are looking for a husband you have to decide what you are looking for. What type of man are you willing to let into your life. They must live up to your expectations. You can let them know that you are not willing to jump into bed with them, you are looking for more in a relationship. If you are worried about scaring them off then you must realize that if that scares them off then you had no chance at a serious relationship to begin with. If he is interested he will stick around.
This is NOT playing hard to get. This is choosing a partner with thought and insight. Know what you are looking for in a husband. Will he be a good provider? Does he have goals? Does he have a plan for life? Is he good around children? Is he able to handle himself in a controlled fashion (not a hothead screaming lunatic)? Does he treat you with respect? (Do you respect yourself enough to make sure you are treated with respect? Ouch!)
Women fall in love way too easily. “Oh, I just love him.” But you just met him. “Yes, but he’s THE ONE!” Stop! You cannot look at the situation objectively if you allow yourself to get too far in emotionally. Which is another reason you cannot jump into bed on a whim.
You have to understand how men think. I know…many of you will say “men think” is an oxymoron. But it’s true, men think differently than we do.
I read a book that made a huge difference in how I look at relationships. It’s by Christian Carter and it’s called “Catch Him and Keep Him” If you follow the link you can sign up for some tips for dealing with men and relationships. The book is well worth the time and money if you are looking to have a great relationship instead of a string of one night stands!
Ladies, we have to do a much better job at picking out the right man. We seem to have given the power to choose to the man. That is not the way it is in nature. The male is always doing a dance or strutting to get the female interested and to pick him over the others. It’s only in humans that we think it’s the man that does the choosing. What can I do to get him to like me?
No….is he worthy of me? Which will take us to another blog on becoming what you are looking for. That’s is for now. Choose wisely Ladies!